Unrelated

Hi peeps. Got me a joke collection - have had it for a while now, actually - just hope it isn't stale already. Biko, if you find it funny, do me a favor and laff well-well; otherwise, well, just keep a straight face - no need for unnecessary frowning.

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I boarded a taxi going somewhere one fine day like that.
In the car with me are two ladies and one old aged man in the front.
We never even go far before the man says to the driver
"Please stop your car . . .stop the car..."

We were all thinking the man had forgotten something,
so the driver stopped the car for him.
The man opens the door, comes down and releases a very loud fart: "POOOOOOOOOHH!!!!!"

Then he comes back into the car and sits down as if nothing happened.
We all stared at him, dumbstruck . . .
The old man looks at us and says,
"Would you have preferred i did it in the car??"

The ladies reply "No, sir... No, sir."
And i add . . . "Thank you, sir."


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Two guys are moving about in a Pick 'n' Pay supermarket when their carts collided.
The following conversation ensued:

1st guy: i'm sorry; i was looking for my wife.

2nd guy: what a coincidence, so am i, and i'm getting a little desperate.
well, maybe i can help you. what does your wife look like?

1st guy: she is tall, with a beautiful long hair, long slender legs, firm body and a very nice backside.
and what does your own wife look like? ask the first guy.

2nd guy: Never mind. Lets look for yours

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Learn Chinese in 5 Minutes
1) That's not right . . . Sum Ting Wong

2) Are you harboring a fugitive? . . . Hu Yu Hai Ding

3) See me ASAP . . . Kum Hia Nao

4) Stupid Man . . .Dum Fuk

5) Small Horse . . . Tai Ni Po Ni

6) Did you go to the beach? . . Wai Yu So Tan

7) I bumped into a coffee table . . Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni

8) I think you need a face lift . . . Chin Tu Fat

9) It's very dark in here . . . Wao So Dim

10) I thought you were on a diet . . .Wai Yu Mun Ching?

11) This is a tow away zone . . . No Pah King

12) Our meeting is scheduled for next week . . . Wai Yu Kum Nao?

13) Staying out of sight . . . Lei Ying Lo

14) He's cleaning his automobile . . .Wa Shing Ka

15) Your body odor is offensive . . . Yu Stin Ki Pu

And lastly...

16) Great . . . Fa Kin Su Pah!!!